the life of weehee...

softballstar99 @ 2005-03-07T21:38:00

2005-03-08T05:48:35Z

Im so sick of high school...the immaturity and the drama..its all so stupid and pointless when you think about it..but i know im gonna miss high school as soon as i graduate...its weird how that works.

And like heather said on her LJ, these next couple of months is stress hell. Softball, AP exams, SAT's, ACT's, prom, umpiring, school, and actually having time to freakin sleep! It seems like i never have time to just sit and relax anymore.

my grandparents are coming from Iowa tomorrow for a whole week..and i have to give them my car for a couple of days..and my mom says i have to stay home and spend time with them..whatever.

softball game tomorrow at vintage..wish us luck! we are undefeated so far..maybe bcuz we have only played one game lol.

i dont know what im doing anymore..i just know that i liked it and it felt right..i guess thats all that matters.

Goodnight all <3

softballstar99 @ 2005-03-03T21:42:00

2005-03-04T05:48:40Z

So this just may have been the worst week i have had in a long time...tell me why things always seem to go wrong all at once?

Im so tired..yet i hate going to bed at night. Thats where i start to think and let things get to me.

i want somebody who will be there to hold me and tell me everything will be okay.

</3

softballstar99 @ 2005-02-27T20:40:00

2005-02-28T04:46:00Z

Im lazy like everyone else and dont write in this anymore...so i thought i would update.

Last night was great...heather, alissa, laura, kym and i went to eat at chilis! Great girls night out :) Then went to indoor and stayed in the parking lot like an hour after laughing at the stupidest stuff lol. And I didnt feel like driving home so heather got to chauffeur me :)

Today was not such a great day. Had a softball meeting for my summer team and was basically given a choice to either play in tournaments pretty much every weekend or not be on the team. So it looks like my summer will be full of softball again. Not only that but I procrastinated and let my hw pile up over the last couple of weeks and now im waaay behind so i spent about 7 hours today catching up. And im still not finished.

Im sooo tired...today has just been one big headache. I think I just need to go to sleep. See you all tomorrow <3

softballstar99 @ 2005-02-15T22:19:00

2005-02-16T06:31:04Z

Havent written in a while...just been having way too much fun!

Valentines day was great...mostly becasue i actually had a valentine this year. it was nice to come to school and find balloons, a rose, and a teddy bear waiting for me in my locker. thanks you baby! :) even thought my balloons got stolen!! lol

Softball has started and even though we are probaably gonna suck this year, im still having fun. i love my softball girls!! Our first scrimmage is saturday at vanden, i expect to see everyone there if its not raining!!

and even though ive been out having fun with my friends, it still bugs me how my parents make decisions w/o me. they decided that im playing in a tournament in las vegas the weekend we get outta school and i have to leave late friday night to be there to play on saturday morning. they booked the flight before they even told me, thats total bullshit.

anyways, common planning tomorrow which means breakfast at bakers square! see u all there! <3

softballstar99 @ 2005-01-31T16:46:00

2005-02-01T00:46:29Z

Things are so screwed up right now. Its one thing for my parents just not to tell me stuff, but its another when they lie to me about things that are gonna affect me and my life and i have to find out from somebody else. Am I wrong here, or should I get a say in the decisions that are gonna affect me?

I never thought I would say this, but I actually want to go to school soemtimes. At least there I can be myself and make my own decisions. I know its sad, but I hate coming home now and find excuses just to stay away from here.

Okay wow, I just did a whole lot of bitching and I'm done now. I'm just gonna try and let it go. School wasnt bad today and we got outta softball early and tomorrow we finally start tryouts!
yeah well thats all. see ya tomorrow <3

softballstar99 @ 2005-01-30T20:36:00

2005-01-31T04:44:24Z

Today was fun. Went to the mall with Alissa and Laura but i didnt get anything. We went to ryan millers work for some food after and then to lauras and made a cool new cd for us! yess i love it :) finally a new cd for my car. lol
And now im back home and wanting to leave because my parents like wont leave me alone. They are constantly bugging me about everthing lately...grades and softball mostly. nothing i can do will ever be enough to please them. sometimes it just gets to be too much pressure on me. Im a teenager, im supposed to go out and have fun. ugh...i dont even wanna think about it anymore.

I missed you this weekend <3

softballstar99 @ 2005-01-27T22:43:00

2005-01-28T06:45:12Z

He finally did it...and I've been smiling ever since :)

softballstar99 @ 2005-01-26T20:22:00

2005-01-27T04:41:50Z

Something I heard today that is so totally true: Life is too short to spend worrying about the little things, just go out and have fun and make the most of the life you are given.

And thats what I plan on doing. I'm tired of having my opinion ignored, and I think I finally got through to my parents that I dont want softball take over my life. They actually listened to me for once.

My legs are super sore from conditioning! Only three more days of it though, and then we actually get to touch the ball.

Are you ever going to just do it?? Im not very good at waiting...

<3

softballstar99 @ 2005-01-24T17:03:00

2005-01-25T01:07:50Z

I'm so fucking pissed off. Some fucking asshole scraped the side of my car in the school parking lot while I was at softball and scratched my right bumper. They took the paint off and everything and my parents arent gonna pay to fix it and I cant get the insurance to fix it because I dont know who fucking did it. Fuck. I hate Mondays.

softballstar99 @ 2005-01-23T17:34:00

2005-01-24T01:46:24Z

Great weekend once again!! Last night went to Heather's bday party at Jordan's house and hung out there for a while. Then Alissa and I went and visited Heather at her house and just chilled there :) Today, went with Heather and Brooke to a Jamaican restaurant (even though im picky and didnt even eat anything lol) and then to like a whole bunch of different stores trying to find them stuff for spirit week.

Parents are so freakin annoying. Cant you just leave me alone for like one day without bringing up the same stuff and having the same arguements.

I cant stop thinking about you. I know I have said this before, but I should stop listening to what people say, because I always end up getting my hopes up. I just dont get it.

Now Im off to do my homework <3

softballstar99 @ 2005-01-18T18:22:00

2005-01-19T02:37:35Z

I was thinking about everything today, and I realized how much I have changed since school has started. These last couple of months have been crazy, but it has shown me so much. I'm a lot more outgoing and social than I was last year, and I have been definately having more fun. And I think thats what I needed in my life because I was just getting too stressed out over everything. Not saying that there still isnt stress in my life because everybody has some, but by having fun on the weekend I can at least keep myself from going insane. I realize that some decisions may have not been the smartest, but I dont regret them and if I had to do it over again I would probably do the same things. I've learned that you need to live life in the moment, and not have any regrets. People always say that high school is the best years of your life, so I'm determined to just go out and have some fun and not worry about the little things.

It felt good to just get all that out. Anyways, school is back and so is softball. I love my softball girls, you guys can always make me laugh :) I went down to Parks to get my letterman today and it looks totally weird. They screwed up a bunch of stuff so now its gonna be like another 2 weeks til I get it. Boo on that.

See everyone tomorrow! Common planning, yesss <3

softballstar99 @ 2005-01-16T16:12:00

2005-01-17T00:41:02Z

These last couple of days have been so fun. Happy Brithday to Stephen who is finally 16! lol. It was nice to just have fun and not worry about shit this weekend. Even though I found out some things that I really didnt want to know.

I think too much sometimes and let shit get to me. Its like a bad habit or something.

Tonight calls for seeing In Good Company with Heather and Alissa. But first, we gotta get that good In N Out Burger! mmmmmm :)

softballstar99 @ 2005-01-12T21:27:00

2005-01-13T05:37:46Z

One day of finals done, only two more to go. At least I got the hard ones done today, got a B on my history (which I got yelled at for by my mom, its a B in kenyons class, that like an A+++!!) anyways, the next two days should be pretty easy so I'm not stressing over it.

Brooke and I went and watched tony and jerbs movie that they made. It was soooo funny lmao! Tony, your super good at making videos, and jerb, well your just a complete idiot :)

I'm gladded we talked about it, and I completely understand what your saying. And I've decided just not to listen to other people, its just to hard to decided who to trust anymore.

I can barely stay awake so I'm going to get some much needed sleep :) Goodnight <3

softballstar99 @ 2005-01-10T20:48:00

2005-01-11T04:55:59Z

I can't fucking stand my parents. We have the same arguement every single time, over and over again. And each time I just resent you even more. Why can't you just let me make my own decisions and live my own life? I don't want what you want, so stop living your life through mine.

My cousin from Iowa called me today. My problems seem so small and unimportant compared to hers. Shes going through such a rough time, and I'm glad she came to me, especially since we don't really talk that much. It makes you appreciate the things in your life a whole lot more.

I'm off to study for that stupid science final. See everyone tomorrow <3

softballstar99 @ 2005-01-09T10:01:00

2005-01-09T18:02:07Z

Last night was fun. Went to the indoor game and then saw White Noise with Heather and Alissa. I was scared shitless and Heather kept screaming and Alissa was like on top of me. lol. It was a good movie though.

"She has dinosaur eyes!" lmao!

Went to Satrbucks afterward and saw Stephen, Kyle and Brian and got to listen to their rap. It was pretty good for them having made it by themselves.

Sometimes I don't know who to trust or who to talk/listen to. But thank you Heather and Alissa for being there and the fun night! <3

softballstar99 @ 2005-01-06T18:38:00

2005-01-07T02:44:41Z

I dont understand how some people can be so two-faced...be careful what you say, the wrong person might overhear you.

No softball conditioning until the 18th! Yessss :)

Finals = next week = boooooooo

My arms and legs and every other part of my body are sore :( Weight training hurts.

Must go start hw now...the OC is tonight! <3

softballstar99 @ 2005-01-03T20:29:00

2005-01-04T04:39:15Z

I hate school.
I hate term papers.
I hate softball conditioning.
I hate homework in general.
I hate stress.

Sorry, just had to get some of that out. I'm almost done with my term paper and then i have to start on all my other hw. Boo on school.

I'm so confused about everything. Maybe its just me, but i have no idea whats going on.

Ahhh, I can't wait to go to sleeeeeep. The only good part of the day :)

Happy New Year!

2005-01-01T22:59:09Z

New Years has got to be the best holiday ever! :)

Last night was awesome. Went to Mel's with my girls (brooke, heather, allie, allison, and laura) for dinner. Stopped by Rich's to say hi and went to Brad's surprise party. Happy Birthday Bradito! Went to Mitch's afterwards and stayed there the rest of the night. :) It felt good to get rid of a little stress and just have fun. I think i went pee like 5 million times last night. lol.

And I really can't stay mad at you for more than like 2 seconds. I'm not sure if that is a good or bad thing.

I need sleep, but I really should get started on my 12 page term paper thats due in a couple days. Why cant winter break last forever...<3

softballstar99 @ 2004-12-28T20:15:00

2004-12-29T04:24:57Z

I don't ever want winter break to end :D

I actually did some homework today. Went over to Rachele's house and did some of the tons of hw I have. I know what I will be doing the sunday before we go back.

I got to drive my dads truck today. I forgot how big that thing really is. Little advice, dont take trucks through the drive through at taco bell. I only ran over a few curbs today :)

Went and visitd Brooke today cuz she got her wisdom teeth pulled. I hope u liked your slurpee! Feel better and dont pass out anymore!

I hate the way parents push you into shit u dont wanna do. Its like they dont understand that I really dont want the same things they do. Uhhh, its so frustrating.

Whatever. I'm done. I just give up.

softballstar99 @ 2004-12-25T00:00:00

2004-12-25T08:07:35Z

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!!!

This is sad, its midnight and I'm up by myself on Christmas. My family is asleep and I'm still really awake. So I guess I will be the first to wish everyone a merry christmas :)

I did some last minute shopping today for the family and people are crazy out there. Some dude actually yelled at me because I took his parking spot when he was still halfway down the parking lot. And my car door slammed shut on my thumb and now its all black and blue :(

Somehow, it just doesn't feel like Christmas.

softballstar99 @ 2004-12-22T12:09:00

2004-12-22T20:21:28Z

I love winter break! :) These last like 5 days have been awesome. I mean, how can u go wrong with friends, food, shopping, and movies? And I really dont care what anyone says, I have so much fun with you and i know your a sweet guy.

Yesterday was great, went shopping at the mall AGAIN with a bunch of people. We did the oxygen bar thingy, its very relaxing. Then we went to alissas and then mitchs after and just watched movies while the guys played poker. Well, me and heather tried to watch the movie but it was hella loud.

Christmas is in a couple days and I still have to get my family gifts. Its kinda hard when u have no money tho :/

No plans for today, call if anything is going on! <3

help...

2004-12-15T04:34:10Z

I need a lil advice here, if u like someone but your not sure how they feel towards you, do u just come out and tell them or just see how things go? U might be able to guess who I'm talking about but I'm too shy just to come out and say it. Somebody please help....<3

softballstar99 @ 2004-12-12T14:05:00

2004-12-12T22:11:18Z

Last night was great, it was the most fun I've had in a while. Winter ball was awesome and everybody looked all pretty. We went to Ihop after and then back to Mitchs :) Besides the fact that I got absolutely no sleep it was a great night.

And then reality comes crashing back down and I'm back to the world of phsycho parents and loads of homework. No to mention the fact I cant even keep my eyes open long to write these stupid freakin essays.

I need a nap <3

softballstar99 @ 2004-12-10T23:42:00

2004-12-11T07:54:36Z

Today was a hella good day. Gotta freaking A on my history test and went to see Ruben's play at Armijio with Brooke, Rach, Laeha, Tony, and Reggie. I miss Ruben, school isnt the same without him but he did hella good in the play and he looks hella older now. Then we went to Jamba Juice and us girls cruised around. Now I'm home alone cuz my parents are at a Christmas party and I'm hella scared cuz some asshole keeps calling my house phone and hanging up. And I swear I keep hearing noises in my house but im probly just paranoid. but yeah, winter ball is tomorrow!! I'm super excited its gonna be so freakin fun. mitch, if u read this call me tomorrow cuz i really need to know whats going on. my mom is getting mad at me cuz i dont have definite plans or whatever..uhhh shes bugging the hell outta me! ok im tired time for bed good night everyone <3

softballstar99 @ 2004-11-27T14:10:00

2004-11-27T22:16:48Z

Wow havent written in this thing in forever. I finally have some time to just sit and relax. Softball finally ended, we had our last tournament last weekend in LA but it got rained out on Sunday so me and cristin went to hollywood. Yeah Hollywood is ghetto, not much like I expected. Vanden softball starts in a January so at least I get a month break. School is fuckin gay right now, too much damn hw and projects to do. Little advice from me, dont take AP classes and definately never take Kenyons class. I'm bored as hell right now, I'm the only one home and I dont have anything to do. Lemme know if u wanna do something. Later <3